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Financial infidelity can take a toll on your relationship. It can be hard to tolerate for anyone to find their spouses are lying to them about finances. Money is a personal thing, and nobody wants to talk about it naturally. You may hesitate to talk about finances with your partner.
Financial infidelity is not unusual. Most of the Brits commit it, but a few of you know the exact reason for it. There are several reasons for causing financial infidelity. One of them is keeping up with the status of your neighbours and your friends. It pushes you to open new credit cards and take out a loan. The other reason is your spending habits.
Well, under both circumstances, you will end up falling in a debt spiral. Once you fall behind repayments, lenders start chasing you and sending threatening letters. Lack of communication is one of the significant reasons, and sometimes people let their partners handle all finances without asking them to account for money in their care until they open a letter from a debt collector.
Before you come to grips with financial infidelity, you need to make sure that your spouse is lying about finances. Before it gets too late, you should keep an eye on the spending behaviour of your spouse.
- Is your partner attending numerous phone calls, emails and letters?
- Are you noticing transferring of money between accounts for reasons you do not know?
- Is your partner applying for new loans and credit cards?
- Have you got to know about a secret account?
If you have been noticing such kind of behaviour, you should immediately understand your spouse is causing financial infidelity. Here is how you can deal with it.
Discuss the matter
Once you have got to know the issue, you should talk to your partner immediately. You do not need to be aggressive as you cannot go back in time to rectify things. Ask your spouse how much debt they owe, how they spend money regularly, whether they have savings or an emergency cushion, and the like.
You cannot make a plan to get out of this debt trap unless you know the austerity of the situation. Once you have this information, the next step is to make a budget.
Find out total income. You will have to add in your income too. Add up all expenses to see the total amount of outgoings. Do not forget to add in debts you owe. Find out where you can cut down. You will have to whittle down your regular expenses so that you could pay off the debts.
Make sure that you do not vent your spleen at your spouse. Do not argue. Instead, find out the ways how you can save you and your partner from this situation.
Talk to lenders
Budgeting is essential, but it is not enough to overcome this situation. You should talk to lenders and inform them of your financial situation. You can consolidate debt if your partner is juggling with several debts. Consolidation can help you pay off all debts in one single repayment.
A debt management company can negotiate with lenders to accept less than what you owe after analysing your financial condition. However, it is not always possible. Your financial situation seems to be darker if you owe more than you earn.
If you are not able to pay off all debts simultaneously, you should give priority to loans with high-interest rates. You can also talk to your lender to allow you to pay the minimum monthly repayment.
Of course, your situation will vary from other people, but having an organised approach to debt repayments can save your finances as well as marriage.
Seek advice from financial counsellors
Sometimes the situation becomes so severe that you do not get any way to get out of it. Here comes the role of financial counsellors. Their advice can help you make some practical plans to get your finances on track.
A financial advisor will consider your financial situation before suggesting your ways to be on top of your expenses. Do not forget that you may need to take out a new loan to pay off all current debts. However, do not forget that an emergency can pop up before you settle all debts. In this situation, you may need to take out a text loan. Before you borrow money, make sure that you analyse your affordability. Otherwise, you will get back to the drawing board.
Dealing with financial infidelity is not severe as long as you carefully assess the situation and make sure that you do not repeat those mistakes in the future. Make sure that you keep analysing your spending so that you do not fall in debt.
Conclusion: Before you deal with financial infidelity, you should know the reasons for it. Talk to your spouse about finances, communicate with your lender and seek advice from financial counsellors.